The Virgin Batch

My now wife and I were in the process of planning our wedding and she asked me what I was going to get for my groomsmen. Here I was just three months before the big day and I still hadn't thought of anything manly enough –and our tight budget wasn’t helping (motorcycles and a trip to Vegas were out of the question).

I was on the internet browsing one of those 'custom jewelry & gifts' places that you usually see in the mall. It gave me a few ideas – but there was no way I was going to pay $40 a pop for a flask that wasn't even engraved yet. That, and the image of somebody taking a dram from a flask to me just screams, "Yep! Future AA applicant right over here! Sign me up now!"

About a week went by: Coming up empty handed, I stumbled upon a site where a guy homebrewed beer for
his groomsmen. Now that sounded like something that I would want. I did a bit of research and found a homebrew supply store only 25 miles from me that I still frequent 'til this day.

After determining that I didn't have a damn clue on what the hell I was doing, needing, or looking at ("What's an auto-siphon?!"), I called up the store. Though it was truly more of a wine store, the store did carry a beginner’s equipment kit and recipe kits. Since I didn’t really have taste buds attuned to REAL beer before I began brewing, I chose something familiar – an Amber Cerveza Style (XX) from Brewer’s Best.

I drove out of the parking lot grinning like a kid with a shiny new red bike. When I got home I quickly opened the box containing all of my equipment and spread it out on the living room table (much to my wife’s dismay). I gazed in wonder at the new and foreign items in front of me and thought to myself, "Great! Now, how do I use it?" Lucky for me, the equipment kit came with a small book to help clear the fog on equipment and the process.

“Wait – so I don’t just throw random things into a bucket and make beer?!” I needed a brewpot.

I had already spent $180 and - if you recall - we were on a tight budget. I ended up finding a good five gallon, stainless steal brewpot at our local Target for around $50 with no eye-rolling and hands thrown into the air from Kayleigh (she's a great gal). From there I decided that I was going to brew on the next day I had off of work.

"Holy crap! It's going to take 6-8 weeks for this beer to be ready!" Upon reading the directions the night before, I discovered that beer took longer than I thought to brew and was relieved I hadn’t put off buying everything until the week beforehand.

The beer turned out to be a success. The night before the wedding we had about twenty-five friends and relatives spend the night at my parents house in Central Texas. The night was just beginning and other beer was already making it onto the scene. I told my groomsmen to meet me outside where we were going to play bags and I'd bring them out something special.

Everyone was hesitant, myself included. I grabbed the bottle opener and heard that 'pfssst' noise and cautiously took a sip, "That's beer alright!" We clanked our glasses around and enjoyed the last bit of relaxation any of us would have in the next twenty-four hours to come.

I'll never forget my virgin batch.